Luckily, there are specific clues to avoidant attachment to help you understand this unique individual. How Different Attachment Styles Affect Relationships | Psychology Today This means that avoidants are often in control in all their relationships both romantic and platonic. They confuse affection with clinginess and use phrases such as smothering, my personal space, or my boundaries.. Thus when there are no more layers to add. These individuals value their independence and are quite efficient at being self-sufficient. 10 Signs an Avoidant Loves You (And How to Make Him Chase You) He Is Afraid Of Rejection. The four attachment styles in children are: Secure attachment. Signs You're Dating Someone With Avoidant Attachment Style | mindbodygreen They disappear. Theyre just a person who cares only about themselves and they certainly wont miss you. The major trait identifying all of the qualities of the model partner for a Love addict is avoidance, which appears ridiculous to their lovers given how forcefully Love Avoidants come on to their partners at initially. They don't want labels and might avoid you for a long time if they start feeling you do. In their relationships both romantic and platonic they tend to oscillate between being too clingy, and too detached. In the book Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How it can Help You Find - and Keep - Love, the authors propose six telltale signs of a toxic relationship: 1) Can't Leave Syndrome. However, unlike anxiously attached individuals who are terrified of being alone, fearful avoidants stay away from relationships altogether. The healthiest relationships often put transparency and honesty above all else. Sure, some might be, but these two terms arent connected. January graduated with an English and Literature degree from Columbia University. If your new love partner is actively seeking to spend time with you, whether it is to read a book or quietly watch TV, it is clear that they have strong feelings for you.